Thursday, December 30, 2010

The Morning Snooze

The other night after a long day at the office, I settled in on the couch to watch a movie when my doorbell rang. There, standing in the dark shadows was a large, intimidating man selling subscriptions for the Springdale Morning News.

It is no secret that the Morning News is not really a newspaper about news in Springdale. The front page today is about a lady that moved from Cincinnati to Fayetteville. That's right, Fayetteville. The online edition isn't any better: Houston man relocates to Arkansas. Exciting stuff, no doubt.

I did learn that the city's No Knock Ordinance is as useless as the local paper. According to Ordinance 82-1:
Prior to engaging in the practice of peddling or soliciting at private residences, all persons must first obtain a copy of the list of residents who desire no peddling or soliciting at their private residence. Any peddler or solicitor who contacts any owner or owners, occupant or occupants of said private residences who are on the list, shall be in violation of this section.
After contacting the newspaper and the authorities I quickly found out what the punishment is for violating the ordinance. Section 1-9 claims:
...a person convicted of a violation of this Code shall be punished by a fine not exceeding $1,000.00, or double such sum for each repetition thereof...
There is no punishment for a violation. Not even a slap on the wrist. What I did get was an obnoxious phone call from someone at the Morning News who advised me it is their "constitutional right" to send Guido out to peddle their rag door to door regardless of any list the city clerk keeps. The man told me they partner with the city and the police department and the police are sick of people calling them about this! Besides, he said people move a lot and the new residents probably don't want to be on the no knock list.


Our local paper is a waste of time and trees unless you can't live without knowing where the Chamber of Commerce and Mayor are traveling this week.


  1. Late breaking news! I heard that a man moved from Alpena to Grove Oklahoma last week. Hell, you can't even go to the grocery store without being accosted by the Morning News sales people. They are everywhere! Guess they are paying the price for the piss poor job of reporting. We can get more news from the "Lovely Citizen" out of Eureka Springs. At least they are factual. What a concept.

  2. What can be done about them throwing their free newpapers in my yard? Nor do I want a free copy from Harps. What part of I don't want your newspaper do they not get? I suppose we could shred them and return to Lowell road. That might make a point after we were arrested. The way I see it... It's litter! Keep your fire starter I have a computer.

  3. It's a sad time to watch your local paper die a slow death. With online ads taking away a rich source of income from classified and display ads being steadily replaced by web interactive and new web ways of identifying consumer interests it's a slow death.
    But as you remarked a lack of content makes this painful death somewhat of a suicide.
    Formerly, The Moron News never worked much on Friday and rarely on Sunday so local readers depended upon TV and radio to fill the void. Sunday editions were pretty much fluffy features for the past few years. Now that they have sharply curtailed letters to editors there's not much left to it. Some occasional business news but Arkansas does a superior job on business reporting.

  4. L.
    well said in all ways.
    glad to find an item on the foi page.